MOG #64: Tried and True

I'm always amazed at what people put together when I ask them to write an MOG. Today, Kaela told me she was happy to write and take a break from writing research papers and I laughed because it's true and I could resonate.  All too often research papers or any other form of school stop us from doing the more soul-searching kind of tasks. But this weekend, a holiday one, is sure to be filled with either moments of gratitude or at least moments of family, friends, loved ones and if nothing else an abundance of mini eggs. Read on, then go celebrate. There's always something to celebrate and always something else to be grateful for as well. 

This weekend embarks the death and resurrection of Jesus, or more commonly known as Easter. This is a time of year when people gather to celebrate; families gather together (whether religious or not) to eat copious amounts of food and chocolate, high school students gather to celebrate the much appreciated long weekend, and university students gather to celebrate the end of a heavy semester. This year wasn’t like any of the past, there wasn’t an Easter egg hunt with mini-eggs hidden around my grandmother’s farmland, there weren’t cousins surrounding the dinner table catching up, and there certainly weren’t any chocolate Easter bunnies with the small round eyes made of icing. But that didn’t make this Easter any less special than any of the past.

By no means am I religious, in fact I’ve often referred to myself as Agnostic. So, Easter to me is visiting family members that I haven’t seen since Christmas and celebrating the end of another school year. This year my grandparents came down to my parent’s house to have dinner and play Bingo (Grandma’s favourite).  I often avoid or even ignore my Grandfather. I know this sounds horrible but he isn’t exactly the most open-minded person in the world. He makes racial slurs and doesn’t think that a woman should have opinions, especially one that differs from his own. So, being a fairly strong-willed person I avoid confrontation because after all he is family. This year I decided to do something different. I actually listened to his complaints and not so subtle racism, and learned something.

          This man went through a lot in his life. Even though he may only have a grade 6 education, he knows the difference between different types of soils, and pesticides, and a multitude of other facts surrounding agriculture that most people couldn’t even fathom.  My moment of gratitude was being able to sit in his presence, and learn something from someone who I’d never really given the time of day in the past. What I should have known, and now realize, is that everyone brings something to the table. What they present may not come in the best packaging, but it’s worth something no matter the delivery.

                   

MOG #63: Clarity

Another anonymous post... 

Today, I got overwhelmed and it sucked. Between school, finding a job, deadlines, moving and graduation looming I had enough. I was just about to start crying in my car when my favourite song came on the radio and I remembered that I love this song because it just sounded good. So instead of crying, I just sat and enjoyed the moment and took a deep breath. I still have courses to finish, bills to pay, responsibilities to tend to and a lifetime of decisions to make in the next few weeks but at least for 4 minutes and 32 seconds, everything was okay. It's a deep breath and we're moving on. My MOG is for that song, that moment and these past four years; all of which have prepared me for "What's next"; whatever that even means.
                                        

MOG #62: Teacher me

My pal Sam took me up on the challenge to write an MOG in 200 words or less as soon as I posed the question to him. Let that moment, this friendship and the following MOG be a testament to the bright, talented, passionate and brave human that he is. Congrats sir- you did it and can't wait to see what you do next. I’m writing this only three days about finding out the amazing news, and it all still feels like a dream come true. It feels like I’ve been waiting my entire life for six pieces of information that would tell me whether or not I got into Teachers College next year. The news came in, and it was exactly the news that I needed to hear during such a difficult and transitioning time. Being accepted into five Teacher Colleges is one of the biggest blessings I’ve received in my undergraduate degree. The possibilities are endless and another amazing, adventure filled chapter of my life is about to begin.

MOG #62: Reign/Rain

This friend wanted to keep his post anonymous. So it shall be... 

It’s really easy to be grateful for the sunshine, for the clear skies, and the open road. My country heart always skips a beat when the windows go down, the sun goes up, and the other cars disappear. Everyone is happy when the sun is out, especially that first sighting after a long winter. Yeah, that’s a special moment. I think we all take it for granted. It’s tough to be grateful when you can hardly take a moment to yourself to let it all soak in. That first sunshine is always one of my happiest moments of the year, but I’m not nearly as grateful for that first sunshine as I am for every time it rains.

I’ll never forget that funeral, or the moment we all found out the tragic news. I’ll never forget the moments I shared with a special angel, a role model, and a pure soul. I’ll never forget the time we were all singing in the rain. With tears falling from our eyes as much as the skies, and I’ll never forget how even in one of our hardest times she could still make us all smile with the ways she touched us all. She was religious, and I never was. But I’ll never forget the moment I finally found someone or something to believe in.

And I’ll never forget that dream I had. The one she showed up in. I’ll never forget the pitter-patter of rain on the roof as I woke up trembling like I saw a ghost. I’ll never forget what she told me in that dream and I’ll always cherish hearing her she’s with me always. I’ll never forget how real it felt. I’ll remember how tough it was to believe at first, but I’ll never forget how it was always raining. It was always raining when I needed her most.

It was raining the day I accepted Brock as my school of choice, and it was raining the day I decided not to transfer. It was raining That One Night that could have changed everything. It was raining on the day We were no longer a We, and we were just a me, and a you. It was raining on the day I came to my interview. I swore it rained for a week when I first moved to the city. Every time it rains I’m grateful. I’m so grateful to know she’s here with me, touching me the only way she can. Every time it rains I’m grateful to have something to believe in, as silly as it may be. As it rains today I can’t help but be grateful that it’s another great day to be alive.

I’m grateful for all the rainy days, whether I need them or not.

MOG #61: Kindness from strangers

This past week on the My Moments of Gratitude Facebook page, there was a call to write an MOG in/around 200 words. Happy to say THREE fine gentleman took us up on that offer. Here is the first, from our good friend Ryland. One of the most sincere, funny, honest and genuine people I've met this year. This is the guy you go to when you need a life chat- there's always a word of wisdom in his stories, hidden behind hilarious anecdotes and an easy-going demeanour. He is one of those people that instantly make you feel at ease. He made my year, this story will likely make your night and a few years ago- a random act of kindness made for an experience of a lifetime... 

This moment of gratitude is a couple of years old, but its a good one to remember.

During my second year of university, I had taken my girlfriend out for dinner for her birthday at a restaurant on King St. Her birthday is at the beginning of March, so it was cold, snowing, and generally miserable to be anywhere outside of a warm blanket. We weren't sure about our plans for the evening post-dinner - poor weather and the financial situation of a student combined to limit the options available - so we figured we'd go to the movies. We were enjoying our dessert when a waiter (not ours) came up to our table and asked us what our plans for the evening. He then instructed me to follow him over to another table in the restaurant where a couple similar in age to us sat. They proceeded to tell me that they had tickets to that evening's performance of The Phantom of the Opera a couple of blocks away but couldn't attend and asked if we'd like the tickets. 

I had no money and started to tell them so, but they stopped me: "No worries. Just take them. It's better they get used than for them to go to waste. But you better leave now because the doors will be closing in ten minutes."

Long story short, we took the tickets, hauled ass through a couple of alleys and got into the theatre just in time to find that not only were the tickets free, but that they were unbelievable seats.

That couple turned what could have been a mediocre birthday for my girlfriend into an amazing memory. I also look back on that night as a reminder that there are awesome people in the world and that any time you have an opportunity to make someone else's life better, you should use it. I try to do this as often as I can and I hope one day I can hit the level of awesomeness that those people did that night.

March Review: Good vibes

Helllo!

Month three, done! Goodness gracious. Springing forward meant lots of reflection, lots of nostalgia and lots of looking ahead. March is always a tough month, but clearly, we made it through, and you guys had some lovely things to say.

Here's a list of this past month's posts and two words that sum up each story (you can click the links to go right to them!)

MOG#52: Lost and Found  : love yourself
MOG #53: Inhale love, exhale fear : breathe easy
MOG #54: Average this  : work hard
MOG #55: Give her time  : always remember
MOG #56: All the ways, always  : family first
MOG #57: Constant : thirteen years
MOG #58: Wrist-ful thinking : carried along
MOG# 59: Brighter Days : run fast
MOG #60: Can't wait : talk soon
MOG #61: For the Youngings : stay gold

One thing I have noticed in a decline in post submissions. Understandably so, it is a very stressful and tulmutous time of year, but I wish that wasn't the case. I've had a few conversations with friends that go something like this,

Me: you should write an mog!
Them: Oh I want to/I have so many ideas/I have a couple in mind/I really should/I know right.. but I don't have time. 

To which, my response is always; you don't have time, you have to make time.  Life is real busy, I get that- heck, this post is going up four days into a new month because I've felt busy with school. But this is a further explanation of why you should make the time to tell your story,

1) Writing something other than an assignment, a transition report, an essay or a presentation is different from writing an MOG. Writing an MOG is not necessarily hard work, it's just different work. It can be cathartic, it can be therapeutic, it can be enjoyable. It can be just nice to write something different, that comes from a different place and a reflection you, in that moment, with that mindset. It's a way to commemorate and celebrate. Are you paying attention yet?

2) Writing something different gets you writing; it's a warm up. It's the appetizer before the meal, the lap before the sprint, or the introduction before the thesis. Anyone can write- it's just words. And for those who can't write, they can produce or create or discuss. It's all relative.

3) If nothing else, you can go to bed saying that you wrote something that others will read. I can't tell you how many people have told me that they are following this blog and I see that in the readership- pageviews are going up (just under 9000!!!). People are readings these stories- your stories- and they are absorbing them. It's both a chain reaction and a web of connectedness.

Life is busy, but gratitude is always persevering- it just takes time to recognize it. And when you do, life just gets easier, better and more meaningful. Trust me... or better yet, try it. 

Sending you all good vibes to make the most out of April, and hope to hear from you soon.

 

MOG #61: For the youngings

Fourth year brings about a wave of nostalgia- there isn't a day where I don't look back on these past few years and think of how far I/we've come. So, it only makes sense to reminisce. Tonight I went through my Facebook and found a note that I had way back before I graduated high school. I wrote it for some of my favourite people- all of whom happened to be younger than me because I wanted them to know that I thought they were cool.

As I read this letter a few things happened, a) I laughed at how much like myself I sounded like, clearly I haven't changed much, b) I remembered who I was writing to- both to these kids, but also for myself. This note was deliberate. I wanted to remember how I felt in that moment and to time stamp my thoughts was one way to do that, c) I took my own advice to heart, which was exactly what I needed tonight and d) this is everything I would want to say to all my friends graduating this year. Besides, of course, congrats guys- you did it (almost!!!) 
So here, while I feel I am tiptoeing around narcissism, I am grateful for reflection. I am grateful that I told these kids these words because I'm still close with several of them and they're not kids anymore, but my peers, and still some of my favourite people. I am grateful for my grade 12 self. I am grateful that I said thank you to these people- for if nothing else, nothing was left unsaid. 
"Hey team, 

I just wanted to take a second to have a little chat with you. With Grad looming, everything has been coming full circle and I feel like if I don't dispense this new found wisdom now, I'll loose it. So here we go. 

You've been tagged in this note for several reasons. In some way, shape or form you have had a direct impact on my life. A combination of your personality traits and actions have left me in awe. Working with younger students such as yourselves has been so rewarding; and every day I am more and more sure of the fact that I want to spend the rest of my life working with youth. I just wanted to give a general statement of what I've learned throughout high school. I'll probably stop you in the hallways and give you a huge, tear filled rant on how awesome you are at some point, but for now this will suffice. 

You know how some people say "I hope you never loose sight of your dreams?"; I don't wish that for you. I wish you a life- a real, rich and wonderful life. (Not that I'm never going to see you all again- I'm just thinking long term here). Anyway, I hope you understand that sometimes dreams change. Life happens, and sometimes you loose your way. That's okay. You're allowed to make your own mistakes. Realizing those mistakes and moving forward is one of the greatest joys life can give. Granted, it may seem like things just absolutely suck, but you'll figure it out. Ultimately, I wish you a life with purpose, success and love. You all deserve this. 

Keep it positive. It's a hell of a lot easier. Just go for what will bring your happiness. And please, never let anyone stand in the way of your happiness. Whether this be in a relationship, between friends, peers or just human beings in general. Don't let other people control you. Get to know yourself; figure out what you like and dislike. In the end, the only one you can fully rely on is you. 

And on this note, you don't have to be perfect. So much of my high school I did this, and it really wasn't worth it. Perfect doesn't get the laughs; perfect doesn't appreciate the messy, perfect won't hold your hand when you anything but perfect. Set high standards for yourself and those around you, but never hold either to this abstract ideal of perfection. That'll set you up for a life of anger. 

Movin on! A common phrase I've heard throughout these past for years always finds its way into big talks like this. "People suck". It makes me laugh that humanity can be so... silly I guess is the word. When it comes to dealing with those around you that are not animals or UFOs, all I have to say is this quote I found.. "Appreciate your parents. Laugh with your friends. Acknowledge strangers. Play with little ones. Respect elders. Be yourself". That'll get you through a lot. 

Remember that there will be people who are better or worse than or equal to you in some ways, but they'll never be YOU. Stay grounded. Remember you're one person who deserves the world, but so does everyone else. 

Befriend staff members at cc- not only will you score sweet perks, but the life lessons you'll get from them are unreal. Prime example- Mrs. G--in guidance; most ballin' lady I know. So chill, yet so motivational. Whenever I feel "off",  I usually go to talk to her. 

Respect and be polite everyone you meet. You never know who you're talking to. But at the same time, don't be afraid to be a little obnoxious at times :P Don't stand for bullshit. Sorry for the language; but you're worth more than that. Fight for what you believe in, but again, keep it respectful. Choose your battles- is something really worth loosing your cool over? Give yourself value, set high standards- that way you're "second best" will end up being really good by society standards. And don't allow yourself to be involved with those who can't meet said standards. I'm not saying be a pompous creep and think you're better than them; I'm just saying don't waste your time. You've got so much more to do in this world than worry about silly adolescent trials. Don't stop. Remember who you are. 

Speaking of yourself, don’t forget about your body. Love your body. Yes, it will change; maybe for the better or maybe for the worst, but it’s yours. Own it. Cherish it. Use it. Most of all, take care of your heart. If someone comes along who is worth your time, you'll know.

Lastly, take time. That sounds weird, but in my opinion, time is the greatest mystery of all. I guess I'm trying to say something along the lines of take it all in. Reflect, rejoice, celebrate, chill, sleep, run, do what makes you, you. “Everything will be okay in the end and if it’s not okay then it’s not the end.” 

This advice all sounds pretty simple and even point blank to me (Duhhhh, Mary); but in all honesty, simplicity is the way to go. 
I hope you search and question; grow and change, accept and defy, listen and speak, love and be loved. I have so much respect for each and every one of you. I see so much potential in each and every one of you. I wish nothing but the best for each and every one of you. If you ever feel useless, incompetent, lame or just plain down; please remember that at least one person in this place thinks so highly of you. You give me hope not only is this school in good hands, but the world is too. 
Thank you for inspiring me. I am a better girl for knowing you all."