MOG #91: A life to live

"I read your blog today and it got me thinking...": this. This has to be one of the best things to hear. Once again, gratitude is best understood when shared, so thanks to Lily for this submission! 

During the first week of school I was super excited to be back and was looking forward to the year ahead, but was also filled with many anxieties. I worried about how fourth year classes were going to be, about starting a new prescription for my recently diagnosed ADD, and how I was going to manage working full time while also being a full time student. Two days before my first class I was in a horrible head-on collision and totaled my car. Luckily I managed to walk away with some minor head pain and back injuries, however it sent a downward spiral on my life (or so I thought). I was already dealing with so much anxiety, now I had this thrown at me… what was I going to do? How was I going to get back and forth from St. Catharines to Burlington for work and school? Was I going to have to quit my job? How much money was this going to cost me? Why would this happen to me? Did I do something to deserve this? I spent the next two days wallowing in self-pity, feeling sorry for myself and angry that life had thrown me this curveball at the worst possible time.

Little did I know that the week ahead was about to bring me a much-needed change in perspective.

Over the course of the two days after the accident I spent every minute with my mom (something we had not done for a while due to my busy work schedule), and at the end of the weekend she said to me “Okay, you have had your cry, now no more. It is time to put on your big girl socks and move on with your life. You have a lot to be thankful for! Look how much time we got to spend with each other. I think I have seen you more in the past two days than I have all summer!” It suddenly hit me that she was right. I had a life to live! A life that could have been taken away in one quick moment of impact, but it wasn't! This was my Moment of Gratitude- I was thankful for the gift of life.

There was no room for being depressed or feeling sorry myself, I wasn't about to let a material object negatively effect my life. So I began to focus on the things in my life that I had to be thankful for. I told myself that everything happens for a reason and even though that reason might not be clear yet, it would eventually all work out. And it sure did, more so than I ever imagined. I had some quality mother- daughter bonding time with my mom, and was reminded of just how amazing she is and how lucky I am to have her in my life. Then I decided to quit my job and spend the semester focusing on school. Next, I looked into taking another course; and in the process of looking into it I had a surprise run in with an old friend. We caught up on our lives and then one thing lead to another and the next day I was changing my major! The result could not have been more perfect… all the courses I had taken up to that point were not going to waste, PLUS it would be more beneficial for my future career.  Things were really starting to fall into place.

This past month was life changing for me; I have truly had a change in my perspective of life… of how to live. I now understand what these curveballs can do. This is the first time in my life I have truly felt I am exactly where I need to be, and it just feels right (I know, pretty cheesy eh). I can’t help but believe that this big change wouldn't have happened if it weren’t for the accident. In some weird twisted way I guess I needed it to experience this major #MOG. Sometimes life throws us these curveballs that set our lives into chaos. I truly believe that we are only thrown them because we are strong enough to overcome them. So even when life throws you a curveball – which it will – and it seems as though you have a million things trying to push you down, think of one positive thought that you have to be thankful for then hold on to it and let it radiate your soul. Find these “little things” in your life every day and you will soon realize just how rich you really are.