So I’m a pretty forgetful person, always have been. One time I went to see a psychic and as soon as we started the reading and she was setting up her table with tarot cards and the recording tape, she suddenly paused, looked me right in the eye and said “I forgot everything I was supposed to do to get started, are you a forgetful person? Can I blame you for this?” We had a good laugh, and yes, my reading was strangely accurate. Further, every morning results in me running between the floors of my house and the garage as I keep remembering things I need to lug back and forth with my throughout the day. My dad likes to refer my steps as the “elephant parade” during these 10 minutes of pandemonium and I like to not acknowledge his presence while I use a hurricane-like force to find my keys or headphones or whatever is hidden in the abyss of my room. Forgetfulness: I’m working on it. I’ve become one of those Type-A personalities that will say “if it’s not in my agenda, it doesn’t exist”. Sorry, not sorry, and I can’t be sorry because I didn’t write it down.
Last week I visited my friend a city over to catch each other up on life. I left and decided to head to Indigo because… wait just kidding, one never needs to explain why they went to Indigo. After the drive I go to check my phone and my friend messaged me to say I left my bag there. No big deal- no wait, just kidding again, that was my teaching bag, which had my wallet, binder, phone charger and laptop in it. I burst into tears immediately upon realization that I have to go back and pick up these items. The drive there and back again would last an hour. I would waste both time and gas money. My phone is tipping over the edge of 10% battery and I’m feeling pretty annoyed at myself and ultimately, defeated, the worst kind of defeated like when game is pretty much over you have to keep playing anyway.
After months and months of organizing and reorganizing: colour coding, sticky-noting, list-making, decluttering and writing every little thing down, I’m frustrated that my forgetfulness translates into carelessness. I sound really dramatic here, but truly, organization is a learned habit for this girl. Metaphors and memorizing Drake lyrics come easy, but asking me to implement and maintain sense of order, all the time? That’s like taking off a kid’s training wheels before they round their first corner- I’m still learning.
So after some tears and some Mumford, I turn my keys and head north. I’m craving a warm drink at this ungodly time of 9:30pm (I have to teach in 12 hours-this is a sick joke) but I remember that I gave up Starbucks for Lent (but that’s another story), so I keep driving. I could have gone into Starbucks and gotten one of the usual options; but my instant reaction was “nope- not for another x amount of days”. But then… it hits me… I remembered! I REMEMBERED SOMETHING! I DIDN’T HAVE TO WRITE IT DOWN OR SAY IT THREE TIMES OR WHATEVER. I REMEMBERED MY LENTEN RESOLUTION!! For once, I’m sticking to a goal. For once, I remembered. For once, it came to me easily. This was the turning point for that night.
The pity party came to a screeching halt- much like my breaks as I realized there was local coffee place a mere two feet from that Indigo/Starbucks situation. But, with my lack of wallet- how would I pay? I look over and see a little flash of green. How lucky that I had a $20 sitting in my other bag left over from the weekend?! I bet that physic couldn’t have even predicted that little fated, happy coincidence.
I go to the barista and do what I always do when it’s a bad day- ask them to make me their favourite drink. 10/10 times, they know what they’re doing. This girl was no exception and was especially kind after taking one look at my mascara-stained cheeks and asked if I was okay. I nodded and laughed, “yes, just had an unexpected turn in my evening”. Then she makes me a dark hot chocolate with extra cinnamon- an unexpectedly perfect combination. I feel ready to take on the drive as I head back to my car.
My drive to my friends house there and back is quick, no traffic and took less time than expected. I get home and crawl into bed and start writing a mental list of what needs to be done for tomorrow. A smile creeps onto my lips and I recall what happened today. Today I taught a lesson that my students enjoyed: I visited my best friend, I chatted with my three life consultants (long-distance friends), I ate delicious left overs from the dinner my parents made and then I made a careless mistake…
But that mistake showed that I’m learning. I felt blessed to have possessions that admittedly are pricey, but help me do things that I love to do. I felt lucky that my ’97 Saturn could stand another drive over a windy bridge (Tony, you’re a gem). I felt gratitude that I have friends across towns and baristas in coffee shops. I felt I should research and give a standing ovation to whoever came up with the idea that chocolate and cinnamon go so well together. I did not feel my mistakes today- I felt the warm and the glow of kindness, growth and friendships. And of chocolate and cinnamon.
